HORROR HOSPITAL (1973), aka COMPUTER KILLERS

Director: Antony Balch

Writers: Antony Balch, Alan Watson

Producer: Richard Gordon

Cast: Robin Askwith, Michael Gough, Phoebe Shaw (as Vanessa Shaw), Skip Martin, Kurt Christian, Dennis Price, Ellen Pollock, Barbara Wendy, Kenneth Benda, Martin Grace, Colin Skeaping, Susan Murphy, George Herbert, members of the band Mystic (James Boris IV, Allan “The River” Hudson, Simon Lust) as themselves, and uncredited cast members Alan Watson, Antony Balch, Ray Corbett, Richard Gordon 

Stressed, young songwriter Jason Jones (Robin Askwith) decides to split the London scene for a while. He visits Hairy Holidays, the travel agency advertising trips for the under 30s crowd. Pollock (Dennis Price), the agency’s proprietor, suggests a stay in Dr. Storm’s Health Hotel at Brittlehurst Manor in the country. On the train ride out of London, Jason befriends sexy, fellow passenger Judy Peters (Vannessa Shaw), who is also on her way to the same resort to visit her Aunt Harris (Ellen Pollock). Unfortunately, Dr. Christian Storm (Michael Gough) is also residing there. The young people that are least likely to be missed are sent to the resort for their holiday retreats to become subjects in Dr. Storm’s medical experiments that turn them into his mindless slaves. 

The Flashback Fanatic movie review 

The British film industry was entering tough times in the 1970s. As that stalwart producer of horror movies, Hammer Films, was beginning to flounder trying to keep up with the changing times and finding it harder to get capital from the US to co-finance their films, other British filmmakers seemed to respond by giving the public something edgier and crasser than the class that was Hammer’s specialty. A graphic example of the lurid extremes some movies would resort to is Horror Hospital. 

The whole premise of Horror Hospital is quite simple. It serves as a situation to feature some exploitation gimmicks: lobotomizing brain operations, mindless motorcycle-riding henchman, a Rolls-Royce outfitted with a decapitation accessory, naked zombies, a misshapen monster, and tantalizing glimpses of Vanessa Shaw’s fine form. 

This is a story about the older generation exploiting the young. That was a sentiment that some movies were fixating on since the late ’60s, but this was not a new aspect in horror films. Since 1957, producer Herman Cohen’s fright flicks (some of which also starred Michael Gough as the villain) often dealt with the same generational conflict. 

Horror Hospital is an absolutely insane mix of nastiness and absurdity that seems ready to try almost anything to get a rise from its audience. Horror always had a hard time with the critics. Horror Hospital seems hell-bent on giving the critics something to really get bent out of shape about as it revels in its own brazen excess. It has moments of humor and odd behavior from almost every character. It also indulges in grisly acts and sleazy deeds perpetrated by Dr. Storm. These incidents are meant to shock the audience, yet they often seem so unjustified that they play out as morbid comedy. 

Michael Gough is a fiendish delight in many of his horror film roles. He is at his most cold and unpleasant in Horror Hospital. In a movie this mad, there is no question that Gough’s Dr. Christian Storm is a truly mad scientist. Dr. Storm’s sole ambition is to wield his medical prowess to subjugate his younger fellow men and, especially, women to his power mad whims. All of his diabolical dabbling seems to serve no cause beyond what will gratify him. Once we learn how utterly messed up this bastard is, we understand why turning off the brains of people is a fixation of his; zombies don’t pass judgment and even the sexiest ones can’t say no.

 

Our hero Jason Jones is almost as offbeat as our mad scientist. He is played by frequent British sex-comedy star Robin Askwith appearing in his third horror film. Here he is a rock songwriter dropping out for a tad, hooking up with a sweet dolly bird, and ending up in a medical madhouse. He is inept, tactless, funny, and oddly likable. When he drops the F-bomb at dinner, he strikes comedy gold. However, I suspect that for every member in the audience that is rooting for Jason there are just as many who think Dr. Storm lobotomizing him would be no great loss. Jason is such an unlikely hero that when he rises to the occasion for anything beyond getting laid it just adds to the absurdity. 

Vanessa (Phoebe) Shaw is a dream come true. As Judy Peters, she is a tender beauty that understandably is a little apprehensive with our hero Jason as a total stranger, but she takes no offense and actually seems to warm up to the guy when he exclaims, “I’m not going to rape you!” Now, that’s a pick-up line I’ve got to remember.

In a flick this warped, it almost makes sense that Dr. Storm’s dwarf accomplice Frederick, who assists in some of the gruesome mayhem, would end up becoming sympathetic and heroic. In fact, this twisted character arc makes him the only character of any depth in this mad movie. Initially, Frederick seems cheerfully evil, but he has a change of heart after abuse from his master, Dr. Storm. As Frederick, Skip Martin contributes plenty of oddball humor that further distinguishes this film. Martin is probably best remembered as Hop-Toad in Roger Corman's Edgar Allan Poe film adaptation The Masque of the Red Death (1964).

Horror Hospital is charged with a reckless energy that makes it seem like a waking nightmare. There are moments of gruesomeness that exist for no reason other than to feel inappropriate, and the final act of the film is full of wild abandon; Jason and his fellow prisoner Abraham (Kurt Christian) suddenly display great ass kicking ability after they spent much of their screen time getting the shit kicked out of them, there is a perverse reveal of the disfigured being lurking in the shadows of Brittlehurst Manor, more Rolls-Royce decapitation action, and a WTF finale that is just a creepy capper to all of the craziness. 

Director Antony Balch spent most of his career arranging distribution for arthouse and exploitation films. Horror Hospital was only the second and last feature film he directed. Balch’s previous movie was an odd anthology film with some horror elements called Secrets of Sex (1970). The independent horror film production veteran Richard Gordon was a producer on both of Balch’s quite successful films. Unfortunately, Balch died much too early, but checking into his Horror Hospital provides a sure cure for any boredom that ails this flashback fanatic.